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Friday, February 17, 2012

Toronto – Health Advice for Leaf Fans

Maple Leaf fans, I am going to talk about the Leafs playoff situation and provide some humorous suggestions to lighten-up the situation and help you make it through the rest of the season without suffering too much stress-related damage. By the way, Toronto was my favorite team for many years and I am still a Leaf fan but Brian Burke has soured my experience and I can’t wait for the day when he is fired. You Leaf fans have a lot of dedication for staying with the team so long and you deserve better! It is hard to believe that the Leafs have not been in the playoffs since the 2003-2004 season. That being said, now I am going give a quick rundown of the current standings in the Eastern Conference and subsequently put some additional stress in your life; however, I will provide you with some health advice to deal with the rollercoaster ride that the Leaf’s have taken you on and will continue to take you on until you find out whether they are going to make the playoffs or not.

As of the morning of Friday, February 17, the Leafs still have the 8th and final playoff spot in the Eastern Conference—with 64 points in 58 games. The bad news is that they have only won one game in the last five (including the 5-0 humiliation at the hands of the Canadiens) and that there are two teams breathing down their necks and three others that still have a chance to catch them.

The Capitals have 61 points and two games in hand on Toronto. The Winnipeg Jets just won a game and they now have 60 points in 59 games. Sorry, but I have to say that I am predicting that the Capitals will turn it on very soon and not look back at the Jets and Leafs—but I hope not. There are three other teams that are not quite out of the picture yet, and they are the Lightning who have 56 points in 57 games, the Islanders who also have 56 points in 57 games, and the Canadiens who have 56 points in 58 games.


Okay, here is my health advice. Consult your medical doctor and ask him or her if the following treatments would be suitable for you—ha, ha, ha.

The Leafs have been up and down and it has been like a rollercoaster ride. For the rough ride you might want to consider Gravol.

For the tremendous stress you might want to take mega-doses of B-Complex vitamins and extra B-12 to be sure.

Keep plenty of clean towels handy—you know the type I mean—because things are not looking that promising for the Leafs and you want to catch the tears so they don’t burn your skin!

If you plan on forsaking the Gravol, stress vitamins and towels, you might want to consider drinking beer or vodka to get through the ordeal! Don't drink and drive.

TJ Stanley